Letting Go
by euphoria falls
Summary: Who knew Sam Uley had a slighty pyschotic illegitimate half-sister? Certainly not Jacob Black...so when Winter Uley comes to town, things get interesting. Why is she so afraid to ask for help? And what is she hiding from those who love her?
1. Our Tree

Letting Go

**Letting Go**

**CHAPTER ONE – Jacob**

**Jacob's POV**

_Prologue_

It was hard. Harder than I'd expected. Letting go. But somehow, I had to. For her, for Bella. It would cause her pain, if she knew how much I missed her, how much I pined for her. Because, when all was said and done, I still loved her. I loved her even though she had married that _leech_. Even though she had chosen him over me. Chose to let him bite her, let her heart ice over and stop beating, chose to thirst for blood and become a mortal enemy of me, the person who loved her more than she would ever know.

But then again, he was everything that I wasn't. He was beautiful, rich, and strong. And he loved her too. If Bella were here, she'd tell me to stop the doom and gloom. She would probably hit me too.

God.

I had to stop this. For my own sanity, and that of the pack. According to Leah, I was driving everybody crazy. But who listens to Leah, honestly? She's a bitter harpy, even more so now she could turn into a bitch in the literal sense of the word.

Sam said I would find an imprint. I refused to believe him, refused to believe I could ever love someone as much as I love Bella. I've seen him and Emily, the way they look at each other. The way they love each other. Complete, absolute. Like the way that _bloodsucker_ and Bella look at each other. The way Bella and I shouldhave been.

No. Bella is happy with her… _husband. _God, that hurts to say. I should let go. I have to let go. But I can't. I can't accept it, I can't face the fact that I lost her. Forever and for always, she's lost to me. I have to move on.

I heaved myself up from the dead tree I was sitting on. Our tree, Bella's and mine. I stood looking at it for a long moment, and then turned on my heel, closing my eyes. No use - the image of us sitting there together was burnt onto my retinas. I hit the tree line running and phased easily with a sharp ripping sound. Damn. Forgot I was wearing shoes. Billy's gonna kill me; that's the third pair in a month I've ruined.

I came loping out of the trees and stopped dead, panting in annoyance as Quil and Embry bounced up._ Hey, Jake you're in for it!_ Quil had seen the remains of my shoes. _Yeah, man. Billy's gonna kill you!_ Embry chimed in. _You're gonna go barefoot for the rest of your life!!_ They found it amusing – it pissed me off. _GET OUTTA MY HEAD!! _I roared at them, and sped up, the easy, languid lope becoming a run. They kept pace easily. _You know man, one of these days you're gonna bust your brain yelling at us, _Embry thought. _Yeah, like I care,_ I snapped at them. _Ooh! Jakey-wakey's in a tizz!! _Leah's sharp voice sounded in my head. _PISS OFF LEAH! YOU ARE THE LAST FRIGGIN PERSON I NEED IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW! _I was close to breaking point. I phased back easily, revelling in the silence and privacy of my own head. The familiar trees whipped past as I headed straight home at a speed that would put a turbo engine to shame. I skidded through the front door and stopped, staring straight into a pair of green eyes.


	2. Winter

CHAPTER TWO – Winter

**CHAPTER TWO – Winter**

**Winter's POV**

I looked up, straight into the eyes of the tall boy who had just burst through the front door. He had deep black eyes, which locked on mine with a puzzled look. He stiffened, and his accusing gaze rendered me motionless. Billy Black broke the silence with an awkward cough, wheeling forward with a single thrust.

"Winter, this is my son, Jacob". Billy's deep voice resonated in the suddenly tense room. I smiled tentatively at Jacob, who stared back at me with a strange look.

"Jake, this is Winter. She's staying with Sam and Emily." Billy's voice had a sharp tone to it, like he was warning Jacob to snap out of something.

"So why is she here?" he asked roughly. His voice was deeper than I'd expected.

"Jake! She's here because I asked her. Emily had to run into town to get some groceries, and Winter came her to use the internet because Emily's is down."

"Oh." He sounded taken aback.

"Anyway," Billy continued, "it's nice to see you too. It's been almost a week, Jake. You could have sent a message."

"I needed to clear my head," Jacob growled. He looked back at me and his eyes softened inexplicably.

"Nice to meet you, Winter." He scowled at Billy and took off out the door.

"I'm sorry about that. Jake's a good kid, his heart's in the right place. He's just had a bit of trouble lately."

"Trouble?" I asked.

"That's for him to tell you. Just be sensitive – he's going through a hard patch." Billy looked pensive. I didn't say any more. I haven't gotten this far in life by prying.

"So." I said. "Internet?"

"Oh. Of course, Winter. This way." Billy led the way down the hall in his wheelchair, finally spinning to a stop in front of the last door.

"The study." He showed me how to set it up, then left me in peace. I was really starting to like Billy. I logged on to my email, cursing the slow dial-up internet that was the standard service here. There were a few spam emails, a few auto-emails from my MySpace page, and one from my friend Hannah back in Seattle. I opened it reluctantly, wondering what I was going to tell her. Either way, whatever I told her would be twisted way out of proportion and sold around the school as gossip.

"Christ. What am I going to tell them?" I wondered aloud.

"Tell them alien's abducted your dog and you had to go and rescue him and you were beamed down in the wrong spot, met some nice people called Sam and Emily, and decided to stay," a deep voice answered. I whirled around in my chair. Jacob was leaning against the doorway, his head almost hitting the top. I hadn't realised how goddamn _tall_ he was.

"Sorry. Did I scare you?" He laughed. "I didn't realise you were a jumpy person."

"I'm not," I snapped. "Don't you make _noise_?"

"Not really. I perfected the art of sneaking around a long time ago. Billy's certainly not hard of hearing! Besides, he's asleep and I didn't want to wake him. I came to apologise for not being very nice before. I've had a lot on my mind, but that's not really an excuse, is it?" He laughed ruefully.

"It's OK. I know how that feels."

"Really?"

"Yeah." When Mum died, I spent six days on the roof of the temporary foster home they stuck me in, refusing to come down. That was why they tried to find family – any family. They reckoned I was nuts. I still don't know.

"So, um, Emily'll be back soon. I better go." He flashed me a small smile.

"Um, OK. Bye then, Jacob." I smiled back at him.

"It's Jake, by the way. Only my dad calls me Jacob."

"OK. Jake." I was rewarded with another smile, this time a big grin.

"Friends?" He asked, sticking his hand out.

"Deal." I took his hand to shake it, but dropped it like a burning poker. _Christ! _His hand was _hot_, as if he'd left it on top of a warm stove for too long. He smirked at my confused expression, and turned on his heel to leave.

"Bye, Winter. See you round."

"Bye, Jake."

"Jake?" An unfamiliar female voice echoed through the house. For a second there was a haunting, pained look in Jake's eyes, replaced by a blank, emotionless façade, which reminded me of my half-brother, Sam Uley.

"Jake?" the girl's voice rang out again, stronger. "Are you here?"


	3. Reasons

CHAPTER THREE – Reasons

**CHAPTER THREE – Reasons**

**Winter's POV**

"Jake?" An unfamiliar female voice echoed through the house. For a second there was a haunting, pained look in Jake's eyes, replaced by a blank, emotionless façade, which reminded me of my half-brother, Sam Uley.

"Jake?" the girl's voice rang out again, stronger. "Are you here?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm here," he replied reluctantly. I looked at him, question in my eyes.

"Leah Clearwater," he whispered. "Biggest bitch you'll ever meet." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively and went to answer the door.

I followed him down the hall into the lounge where Billy was just waking up. Jake went to get the door. Billy just looked at me.

"It's all good," I whispered to Billy. He smiled and simply said: "Good".

A tall Quileute girl walked into the room after Jake. She was tall and slender, with _amazing_ muscle tone. Leah was pretty, beautiful even, but her perfect features were marred by a nasty smirk that was playing around the edges of her mouth.

"Hey, Billy, Mum sent me to ask if you and Jake and wanted to come over for dinner. Me and Seth are going out." She delivered all this in a sharp voice, which clearly said 'I don't want be here'.

"OK. We can give you a lift back if you don't mind waiting." Billy's tone was warm. He obviously was pleased by the invitation.

"Hey, we can drop Winter back to Sam's on the way. He lives just around the corner from Sue," Jake suggested. I think he just wanted to avoid a car trip with Leah. I looked at him, and the small grin he flashed me confirmed my suspicions.

"That'd be good," I chimed in, winking at Jake. "I can wait with Leah. You guys go get decent." Billy smiled and we both looked pointedly at Jake, who was barefoot and covered in dirt and grease. His jeans were cut off at the knee, and his black t-shirt had numerous holes and tears in it.

"Point taken!" Jake laughed and followed Billy down the hall.

Leah plopped down on the couch and patted the spot next to her. I sat down, reading blatant curiosity in her eyes.

"So why are you staying with Sam and _Emily_?" The way she spat Emily's name, the utter loathing which was all too clear in her voice, made me immediately dislike Leah. How _anybody _could possibly hate Emily was beyond me. Emily was the sweetest, kindest person I'd ever met, including my own mother. Leah was still waiting patiently for an answer.

"Uh, it's a long story," I said, desperately stalling. I didn't _want_ to tell people why, and Sam and I had agreed to keep the real reason quiet.

"I've got time. Jake'll take ages in the shower." She smirked.

I racked my brains trying to come up with an answer that sounded legitimate. Suddenly, inspiration struck.

"Well, unfortunately my dog, Jump, was abducted by aliens and I had to go and rescue him. I made peace with the evil green Martians and they let me go. But they beamed me down in the wrong spot. But then I met some nice people called Sam and Emily, and decided to stay with them. End of story." I smiled widely, and heard a sound from down the hall, which sounded somewhat like a muffled shout of laughter. Leah sighed.

"I meant seriously." She looked slightly annoyed.

"That's private. It's between me and them."

"Hmph." She turned back towards the TV and flicked it on.

"Alright! We're ready." Jake bounced down the hall, Billy following closely behind.

"Let's go, then," said Leah impatiently. She stood up and made for the door.

"I hope we can all fit in the Rabbit," I heard Jake mutter as he shot Leah a dirty look. I laughed and followed her out the door.

That night, I lay awake, trying to force myself to sleep. Insomnia can be so… annoying. I first started having trouble sleeping after the accident; every time I closed my eyes the terrible scene from that night would play back, like a movie stuck on a loop. It got to the point where I was too afraid to close my eyes. I haven't had a good night's sleep in about a year. I closed my eyes reluctantly and buried my face in my pillows, trying desperately to block the images that threatened to flood my mind. I drifted off into an uneasy sleep, and my dreams were plagued by the memories I had tried so hard to forget.

_I ran frantically from room to room, searching for something I couldn't find, praying for something I couldn't have. I heard a sound behind me and turned, not wanting my back to whatever was behind me. I saw… nothing. I was suddenly aware I was no longer in my house, rather at the end of a long hallway lined with doors. They were all locked. I began to run towards the other end, where I could see an open door. I ran for what seemed like eternity. Finally I reached the door, only to have it disappear. I stood on the edge of a cliff, far above the black water that crashed on to the rocks below. I heard a dry sob behind me. The fear of what I would find when I turned around, who it would be behind me, froze me into place. My gaze was fixed on the rocks below. The boiling mass made a strangely hypnotic sound as they rhythmically smashed into the cliff. I felt a gentle pull as I leaned out further. A voice stopped me when I was on the verge of falling._

"_Winter? Sweet, what are you doing?" I turned violently._

"_Ma? Is that you?" I whispered. I could only stare at her, reach out a hand. She was so beautiful, her childlike smile beaming out at me. Laughter shook her body, waking me from my trance-like state. Ma was laughing, but the sound of her laughter was off. It sounded…wrong. I gasped in horror as she seemed to melt, her edges running together. In a second, I could see clearly. She became a he, as I watched. Long arms with pale fingers stretched toward me. Shuddering, I looked up at his face. It was as I remembered it, with a gloating sneer twisting the pale face. I lifted my face even more, to look my tormentor straight in the eye. I screamed. His eyes were red, blood red, not the cold grey I remembered them to be. _

I woke from my nightmare screaming. All of a sudden, I was aware of gentle arms around me, and a soothing voice humming a lullaby. For a second, a glorious painful second, I thought it was my mother.

"Hush now, Winter, you're safe here. You're safe here." Emily's sweet voice held sway, and banished the last of the nightmare images back to their dark corners. I was vaguely aware that I was sobbing; great racking sobs which shook my body. A light flicked on, and a tall frame blocked the light spilling in from the hall.

"Is she okay, Em? I didn't know this would happen." My brother's hushed voice spoke from the doorway.

"She'll be fine, I think. Just give her a minute." I could hear Emily's voice reverberating through her slender frame. I felt cool fingers under my chin as she tilted my head up.

"Are you gonna be alright, Winter?" It took me a moment to realise she was speaking to me.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'll be fine. Just gimme a second." I took a few deep breaths.

"I'm fine now. Really. It was just a nightmare," I assured them. Emily looked at me questioningly and then sighed.

"If you're sure. See you in the morning, Winter."

"Night," I responded vaguely. "Oh, Emily … thanks." She smiled and closed the door gently after her, plunging me back into darkness.


	4. New Beginnings

CHAPTER FOUR – Beginnings

**CHAPTER FOUR – Beginnings**

**Winter's POV**

I woke, and for a second had a moment of startling disorientation where I had absolutely no idea where I was. Then I remembered. I was at Sam's, in the guest room (now effectively 'my' room), and today was my first day at the La Push High School. Groaning, I rolled out of bed. I rummaged through my chest of drawers, looking for a shirt that was relatively clean. Tidiness was definitely not one of my attributes. I would have to go shopping soon, I mused, as I searched for a shirt. Finally I pulled out an old, black Rolling Stones t-shirt, grabbed my jeans off the floor and my towel off the back of the door as I headed to the bathroom. I turned the lights on and locked myself in. As I waited for the shower to heat up, (Sam's house having a notoriously bad hot water service) I assessed myself in the mirror. I realised that if you looked carefully, you could actually see the family resemblance between me and Sam. I just prayed nobody looked close enough. I hated questions, hated having to answer, knowing that everything I said would be warped and passed around the school in the form of malicious rumours.

I analysed my face carefully. I could be pretty, I thought, though not in the traditional Quileute sense. I looked straight into my reflection. Piercing green eyes looked back at me, framed by pale skin and wavy ebony hair. I had Ma's skin, clear (thank god) but incredibly pale. Yet, I had somehow defied the genetics that said I should look like my mother and inherited my father, Joshua's, black hair. I wondered about this as I stood in the shower, letting the hot water pummel my shoulders. Sam and I had agreed to keep our family ties a secret, preserving both my parent's reputation. Not that Joshua Uley had had much of one to start with. We settled with telling people I was Emily's niece from up on the Makah reservation, instead of just blurting out that I was his illegitimate half-sister. _That_ would definitely make people curious. Curious enough to ask questions, and that was definitely the last thing any of us wanted. I tried to relax, tried to push all thoughts out of my mind. Unfortunately as I did that, it left room for more thoughts to come in. And that was how I found myself thinking about Jake.

He's been teaching me to fix cars like he does, down in his little garage at the back of his place. It had been a little over a month since I'd first met Jake that day at Billy's. I saw him almost every day after that, both of us making up lame excuses to go to the other's house. Jacob and I had just slipped into one of those friendships that seemed as natural as breathing. Finally we stopped making excuses and just turned up randomly, usually citing the evil green flying llamas as a reason. Hey, it worked for us! So yeah, we were practically inseparable. And whenever I was a bit sad or depressed, Jake would turn up out of the blue and cheer me up. It was like he had his own personal Winter radar. I giggled and let my mind wander as I got out of the shower and finished getting ready for school.

I was halfway into the kitchen when a deep, familiar voice pulled me up short. Speak of the devil and he shall appear indeed!

"So what's for breakfast, Aunt Em?" I froze in the doorway, and then chided myself for being silly. _'It's just Jake!' _I chided myself. _'It's not like he's going to eat you!' _I summoned my confidence and walked as naturally as I could into the kitchen. Five pairs of eyes looked at me and five voices chorused:

"Good morning, Win-ter!" like I was a kindergarten teacher.

"Whoa, whoa!" I flung my hands up.

"Glad you decided to join us, sleepyhead!" Emily teased as she handed me a plate loaded high with blueberry pancakes. I looked at the plate, then at her in amazement.

"You really expect me to eat all this?" I asked, bewildered.

"I forget. Catering to such hungry boys all the time, you usually overcompensate." She waved her hand around the room. I looked up. Sam, Leah, and Jacob were smiling. There was a guy sitting on the counter near the stove. He had sandy brown hair and looked scarily like Leah. He was also huge, almost as big as Jacob.

"Winter, this is my brother, Seth," Leah stated with a scowl. Jacob just looked at me from over the top of Leah's head with an exasperated expression, and I desperately tried to suppress a laugh.

"Hey, Winter," Seth said slyly. "Are you gonna eat those? Cos, I could help, you know! And I'm still really hungry!" He shot a look at Emily, and I couldn't stop my laughter any more. It rang out, taking Seth by surprise. Well, Seth really did look like a giant cuddly teddy bear when he looked at you with those puppy dog eyes. After a few seconds of me laughing like a maniac though, Seth and Jake joined in. even Leah cracked a smile, which stunned me. I didn't know she _could_ smile.

"Alright. You can have some," I said, relenting. "But let me eat first okay, Seth?" Still laughing, I sat down at the table across from Jacob and offered him a pancake.

"Hey! How come he gets pancakes and I don't?" Seth whined in an injured tone.

"Because he's my friend and I only just met you. And because he didn't beg." Jake just grinned widely at Seth and stole another of my pancakes, so I took pity on Seth and sent a few flying his way. Soon his grin matched Jake's as they both devoured my breakfast.

All too soon, we were headed out the door. I took a few deep breaths to calm my nerves, and then moved to Jake's Volkswagen Rabbit, beating Seth to the passenger door by a few steps.

"I call shotgun!" I cried, and smirked at Seth.

"Well, fine, be that way," Seth pouted. I stuck my tongue out at him, and he stuck his out in response.

"Real mature, you guys!" Jake jumped into the driver's seat and I swung into the passenger seat, beating Seth again by only a few millimetres. I slammed the door closed and locked it, making childish faces out the window at Seth, who stuck his lower lip out and got in the back seat, with Leah following suit. I looked over at Jacob to find him pissing himself laughing. I couldn't help it and I burst out laughing too. His laughter was so infectious. Soon the entire car was rocking with laughter. Even Leah joined in, which was pretty special. She hardly _ever_ laughs. We were still laughing as we pulled up at the school. I looked out the window and suddenly my supply of courage was all gone. I stared up at the teenagers swarming up the steps in large throngs. Leah and Seth were gone in an instant, calling out to friends, and it was just me and Jake in the car. I swallowed. I could do this. I had to believe that. I felt a large, warm hand on my arm and I looked up, straight into Jake's eyes. They were full of an emotion I didn't recognise.

"You can do this, Winter." The statement was quiet, unsure, but somehow I believed every word.

"Yeah, I think I can." His eyes searched my face for something. He leaned in involuntarily, and said even quieter,

"I know you can." I felt my breath catch in my throat as his eyes burned, struggling with some inner emotion. I had a sudden mad desire to reach out, touch his face, help him, and ease the struggle. Amazingly, though, I didn't. I smiled at him and broke the moment, getting out of the car.

"C'mon. We're gonna be late." I grabbed my bag and headed off toward the main building. An arm snaked around my waist as I felt myself being pulled in the opposite direction.

"You're going the wrong way, baby girl," he growled playfully in my ear. I sighed and let him pull me along.

I let Jake drag me along for a few metres, then stuck my heels in and shook his arm off.

"I'm perfectly capable of walking to the office myself, thank you very much, _Ja-cob!_" I dragged out his name so he would get the point. Unfortunately that failed and he just laughed. I folded my arms with a 'Hmph' and turned my back on him. Next thing I knew, I was in the air, being carried awkwardly over his shoulder.

"Put me down! Put me down!" I was screaming at him, and I could feel the reverberations of his laughter echoing through his chest. He finally put me down and we both dissolved into helpless laughter.

"Dude! Jake's…laughing?" I heard an unfamiliar voice and I turned. I could have sworn Jake was behind me, but I was facing Jake, times seven. I recognised Seth, Embry, and Quil. They were almost as helpless as we were.

"Okay. Not funny, guys." I narrowed my eyes at Embry, who had a strange compulsion to pick me up every time he saw me.

"New rule." Embry and Quil groaned. I had been forced to set down rules ever since I met them for my own personal safety.

"Winter's feet", I used third person to emphasise it, "stay on the ground at all times. Okay? That applies for you too, Jake. No more making fun of me because I'm short!" And I was short, only five foot three. I didn't even come up to Jake's shoulder. But then again he was six foot six, so he had an unfair advantage. Meanwhile, Seth was rolling on the ground laughing. I rounded on him.

"You too, Seth. ALL rules apply to you. And I might need some more."

"Like what?" Seth choked out.

"Hmm, I know. I always gets shotgun because I'm the shortest." That shut Seth up pretty quick. I stuck my tongue out at him for extra effect.

"Okay, enough fun at Winter's expense," Leah cut in sharply. "We're gonna be late to class."

"Hold up there!" Jake said suddenly. "Winter, these guys are Paul, Brady and Collin. And of course you know Seth, Leah, Embry and Quil … hang on, where did Quil go?"

"Here I am!" he sang, barrelling through people as he came toward us. "I got Winter's schedule and stuff." I just looked at him. Quil grinned.

"A little bit of thanks wouldn't go astray!" he whined.

"Fine, thanks," I muttered under my breath. Jake's smile grew wider, if that was even possible.

"Leah's right, though," I pointed out. "We're all gonna be late." We moved, laughing as a group at Quil and Embry's antics, up the steps and into the school. Quil, Embry, Jake and I left the others in the hall, as we had Government first period in building three, while the all others had English first, in building one. Paul, as a senior had a free period. I envied him, because I hated school at the best of times.

"C'mon, Winter, it's not that bad." I looked up to see Jake grinning.

"Yeah, Winter, the teachers are all pushovers," chimed in Embry. I took a deep breath and walked into the classroom.

"Mr Black, Mr Call, Mr Ateara. So glad you could join us today," the teacher said acidly.

"Sorry, Mr Cario. We were showing our new student around," Jake replied.

"Ah! Fresh meat! Where is she?" He frowned. "I don't see her." Embry chuckled and pulled me out from behind Jake.

"This is Winter Fields. She's cool!" Quil introduced me enthusiastically.

"Thank you Mr Ateara. Please take your seats. Ms Fields, there is an empty seat next to Mr Black. That can be yours."

"Aw, Jake, how come you get her? I wanna play with Winter!" Quil pouted. Jake just raised an eyebrow.

"As I recall, last time we let you and Winter 'play' you ended up trashing my shed.

"Hey!" I said. "We were playing hide and seek! It's not my fault Quil gets… overenthusiastic!" Embry cracked up.

"Besides, we cleaned it up!" Quil added.

"WILL YOU PLEASE PAY ATTENTION? MS FIELDS, MR ATEARA! THIS IS MY LESSON!" The teacher, Mr Cario, looked like he was about to have an apoplexy.

"Sorry!" We all chimed.

"It's nearly the end of the lesson, anyway," Jake muttered. "Not like anyone else is listening anyway." I shot Jake a quick grin and then busied myself with copying the notes from the board.

When the bell rang, we all jumped up and bolted for the door. In the ensuing chaos, I was nearly crushed between Quil and the doorframe. I struggled futilely get free. All of a sudden, I was assaulted from every side by my memories of that hideous night. I couldn't breathe. No one was coming to help. I was alone again. I shrank against the wall, fighting the dark that threatened to close in on me. I knew that if I did, I would be at the mercy of my unknown assailant. I wanted to face him head-on, face the demon with the nightmare eyes. Face the man from my dreams. I collapsed to the floor as the memories burned, etched forever on my brain. I couldn't forget even when I desperately wanted to.

Warm arms were suddenly around me, and concerned dark eyes looked into my frantic green ones. Faces jostled into my field of vision and I shied away from all the curious stares.

"Winter? Ohmigod, Winter I'm so sorry. I didn't see you. Are you OK? Please be OK…." Quil's voice trailed off.

I found my voice and tried to laugh it off, but I was a bit shaky.

"I'm fine. Quil, you have a huge ass if you didn't see me!" I felt the arms around me shake with laughter. He looked miffed, and then he grinned.

"It's not my fault you're tiny." I stopped smiling then and gave him a death glare.

"Jake's booming laugh sounded from behind me. I realised, with a twist of my insides, that he had been the one to catch me, and that it was his arms that were warm around my shoulders. He got to his feet, helping me up along the way.

"C'mon, baby girl. Let's go to the cafeteria." He slung an arm around my still shaky shoulders, and led me gently out of the classroom. Quil and Embry bounded happily after us, laughing and joking as if nothing had happened.

I sat silently next to Jake in the cafeteria at lunch, lost in my own little world. He kept his arm around me, somehow sensing that I was still fragile, liable to break at the slightest thing. I sighed and shifted closer to him. I just felt so damn safe with him! Jake… he was just… Jake. He looked down just as I looked up, and as I caught his eyes, a strange, tender look flitted over his face, passing so fast I wasn't sure if I had imagined it or not.

"You feeling okay, baby girl? You don't look too good. Do you wanna go home?" I shook my head.

"I'm fine, I think." He raised an eyebrow. I smiled weakly at him and stood, planning to ditch my tray and then go to my locker. My body, however, obviously had other ideas. My knees buckled underneath me and I collapsed back onto the bench.

"Nu-uh. You are not fine. Come on, I'm taking you home."

"I'm fine!" I insisted. "Really, I'm good. We've gotta go to class." I stood up again, grabbing my art diary with one hand, and reaching for my bag with the other. Jake frowned, grabbed my bag with one hand and my free hand with the other.

"I said, I'm taking you home," Jake repeated, and began towing me toward the nurse's office. I took four steps and my treacherous legs gave way again, piling me in a heap on the cold tiles. My head hit the floor with a sick thud, and last I saw before I drifted into black oblivion was Jake's face, all scrunched up in worry.

I came to in the nurse's office, with absolutely no recollection of how I got there. I panicked, remembering the last time I'd woken up in a strange place. The only difference was that back then there'd been a psycho leaning over me with a machete.

"God, Winter, you gave me a scare then!" Jake's voice sounded nearby, but I couldn't see him. I sat up, trying to find him, needing to see someone there. My head spun and I moaned

"Whoa, baby girl, bad idea." He gently pushed me back down onto the bed.

"Jake?" I whispered hoarsely.

"Relax, I'm not going anywhere. I'm taking you home now, okay?"


	5. Seashells and Sanity

CHAPTER FIVE – Seashells and Sanity

**CHAPTER FIVE – Seashells and Sanity**

**Winter's POV**

I walked through the front door and flopped onto the couch, not looking forward to the homework stuffed into my bag. I wished I could ignore it, but I could feel the gloomy presence. I'd forgotten how irritating schoolwork could be sometimes. I longed for the day I could finally turn my back and forget about it forever.

"Damn you, cruel work, damn you to the deepest depths of Hell!" I glowered at the blue folder I could just see sticking out the top of my bag.

"Winter, is that you?" Emily's voice came from the sitting room. Damn, she heard me talking to inanimate objects again.

"Yeah, who else?" I said grumpily.

"Will you come and join us please? There's someone here to see you."

I walked through the door into the sitting room, fully expecting Jake or one of the boys. Instead, there was an angular woman in an ill-fitting grey suit turning to look at me. I saw the spark of recognition in her cold blue eyes just as I realised who she was, and exactly what she was doing there. I stared her down.

"Leave, now." I had never realised my voice possesed such a scary pitch. It was cold and deadly, with just the right amount of venom. Unfortunately, the woman knew what to expect and didn't even flinch.

"Hello, Ms Fields. Or should I say Uley?" She glared at me for a moment, then turned back to Sam and Emily, ignoring me completely. "I just need you to sign these forms, seeing as you're her legal guardians and all." She glanced over victoriously, and I saw myself reflected in the icy blue orbs. Pale and shaking with anger. There was fear there too, but it would not do to let her see it. I was not allowed to show weaknesses here.

"Winter, this is…" Sam looked shocked as I interrupted him rudely.

"I know who this is. She was just leaving." Emily looked back and forth between us, evidently confused. I guess Sam had failed to fill her in on the details then. With a toss of her head, the woman broke into mine and Sam's staring contest.

"Winter," she said, adressing me directly."You'll need to be prepared to leave in half an hour. It's a long drave back to Riverview." She was looking at me as if I was a bug squashed under her shoe.

"No," I said flatly. "There is no way in hell I'm going back there." Sam bit his lip, Emily frowned and the woman in the grey suit just looked at me coldly.

"You don't have a choice," she said haughtily. I exploded.

"The hell I do!" I went through that once and there no fucking way I'm ever going back again! That place is hell on earth!" I was on my feet, breathing heavily, and if looks could kill this woman would be stone dead.

"In that case, expect a visit from me and some friends tomorrow. If you won't come willingly, we'll do it the hard way, Winter Uley." She stood abruptly and left, leaving me shaking uncontrollably. Sam looked stunned whilst Emily looked dangerously pissed off. "Sam Uley, what the hell was that?" She glared at him. "Don't even think about lying. I want the truth." He looked over at me.

"Em, it's not my truth to tell." Her face lost some of its anger, confusion taking its place. She, too, glanced over at me.

"Sam…" I let my voice out pleading.

"Sorry, kid. I know how much you wanted to leave this behind, get a fresh start."

"But, Sam! My friends, if they found out... if Ja-," I cut myself off quickly. I didn't want to think what would happen if Jake found out. I didn't think I could handle it.

"Winter, Emily won't tell. She can help you." He was too gentle, trying to placate me. I just wanted to hit something to release the ball of nervous tension and rage that was boiling in my belly.

"Fuck that, Sam. I don't need help. I'm fine."

"Then why did she come here all the way here? You need help, Winter. The nightmares are getting worse and you're not…"

"I'M FINE!!" I yelled. "I'M FINE!!"

"Winter…"

"Would someone care to explain what the hell is going on?" Emily snapped at Sam. "What's wrong with Winter? What am I missing here? What aren't you saying?" She looked ready to either break down or explode. Sam looked at me warily. I just sighed and answered his unasked question.

"Tell her if you must. I'm going to bed." I left the room, not wanting to see Emily's face when she realised why I was the way I was, and not wanting to hear Sam's explanation. He was going to dance around the subject and use medical jargon to try and mask the truth. The truth being, I'm crazy.

Medically certified mental.

Abso-fucking-lutely insane.


End file.
